They have observed or it has happened to them that in this “modernity” the obscene, vulgar, perverse, maniacal, sadism and insensitivity has become something to “seduce“…
Many times we feel not courted or seduced at all, but cornered in a maniacal perversion that scares us, disgusts us or totally rejects us! It is harassed to force us to accept this as a seductive courtship, we are cornered into agreeing to do it, we are cornered with no way out of choosing, and this should not and cannot happen!
Excuse me! Don’t call me old or old or retarded, because being raped or watching a video (which is now called porn, watching gay sex between 2 men or with a trans with a penis who is not a woman today is called sensual seduction) sorry, This is not modernism, nor is it less exciting or pleasant, and I know that there are many Women and Men in the World like me.
Learn to seduce with romanticism and sensuality, without perversion, without vulgarity or obscene.
And if you have problems with constant sexual thoughts, here I share definitions and links.
Sexual obsessions is not romantic sensuality
Sexual obsessions are persistent and unrelenting thoughts about sexual activity. In the context of obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD), these are extremely common, and can become extremely debilitating, making the person ashamed of the symptoms and reluctant to seek help. A preoccupation with sexual matters, however, does not only occur as a symptom of OCD, they may be enjoyable in other contexts. People with sexual obsessions can devote an excessive amount of time and energy attempting to understand the obsessions. They usually decide they are having these problems because they are defective in some way, and they are often too ashamed to seek help. Because sexual obsessions are not as well-described in the research literature, many therapists may fail to properly diagnose OCD in a client with primary sexual obsessions. Mental health professionals unfamiliar with OCD may even attribute the symptoms to an unconscious wish (typically in the case of psychoanalysts or psychodynamic therapists), sexual identity crisis, or hidden paraphilia. Such a misdiagnosis only panics an already distressed individual. Fortunately, sexual obsessions respond to the same type of effective treatments available for other forms of OCD: cognitive-behavioural therapy and serotonergic antidepressant medications (SSRIs). People with sexual obsessions may, however, need a longer and more aggressive course of treatment.
Sexual sadism disorder is characterized by taking sexual pleasure from humiliation, fear, or another form of mental harm to a person. Sadistic acts include restraint (such as ropes, chains, or handcuffs), imprisonment, biting, spanking, whipping, or beating. When someone repeatedly practices these sadistic sexual acts without consent from their partner(s), or when sadistic fantasies or behaviors cause social, professional, or other functional problems, sexual sadism disorder may be diagnosed. Extreme sexual sadism can be criminal, and lead to serious harm or even the death of another person.
Sexual sadism disorder falls under the category of paraphilic disorders, which are characterized by sexual interests, preferences, fantasies, urges, and behaviors considered to be “atypical.” These interests, preferences, and behaviors are considered symptoms of a disorder only if they are acted upon in ways that have the potential to cause distress or harm to oneself or others, especially others who have not given consent.
Seduction, and the so-called “Art of Seduction,” is laden with ambiguities and apparent contradictions. So much so that it can almost be viewed as a paradoxical phenomenon. Similar to rape, to which it’s frequently compared, it’s undeniably manipulative. Yet while its various stratagems may at times overlap with those of rape, it’s essentially about process and persuasion versus threats, physical force, and violence.
More important, still, the artifice and machinations characterizing seduction aren’t entirely one-sided. Its implementation typically involves one person (traditionally the male) in the role of subjugator and the other (generally the woman) reacting submissively as the subdued—whereas in rape there’s clearly a perpetrator and victim. But by its very definition, seduction implies a certain mutuality, connoting at least some degree of consent. (And I should add here that this is true whether the seducer is male or female, though for simplicity’s sake this post will refer to the male as seducer—as opposed, that is, to the woman as seductress).
Except in sexual fantasies—engendered by the libido- or ego-inspired wish to be irresistibly desired—it can safely be asserted that no one ever chooses to be raped. But there are many individuals (and not just heterosexual women) who secretly yearn for the excitement, the thrill, the peculiarly “illicit intimacy,” of being the coveted object of another’s lust. Which is to say that there are times when the seducee, however unconsciously, can actually be seen as paradoxically complicit with the seducer. In addition, and also paradoxically, if the seducee is still a virgin, her very innocence—artless, untainted, and ingenuous—can carry its own powerful seductive allure. I think few men would disagree that a young woman not yet “deflowered” can project a vastly more appealing, and tempting, eroticism than any hard-core, provocatively dressed prostitute.
Moreover, though at its worst, seduction can be seen as shamefully exploitive, it really can’t be described as demanding, threatening, or coercive. Rather, it’s captivating, luring, enticing. And while it never starts out as consensual, ultimately it ends up that way. In a sense, it’s like “surrendering” to a delectable piece of chocolate. No one aimed a gun at you and aggressively forced you to eat it. But there it was—right in front of you and just so enticing that eventually it simply overwhelmed your will to resist.
It could be said that seduction appeals not to the seducee’s higher, more principled self but to their more impulsive, romantic, sensuous self. And this may be why the emotion following their seduction may be regret. The more positive aspects of their ambivalence now affirmed, the negative parts may well regain prominence.
And this would be likely if, subsequent to the encounter, the seducee comes to regard their submission as reflecting personal weakness—as their having wimpishly caved to the other’s desire. Additionally, they may come to recognize that their being passionately made love to didn’t at all mean that they were loved or cared about: Only that they’d been conveniently used to gratify the seducer’s indiscriminate sex drive, or need to assert sexual dominance over them.
Disturbing thoughts, also known as intrusive thoughts, are common and normal in most cases, but they may be confusing or distressful. Some people become obsessed with these thoughts and have a hard time moving past them. If you think that you’ve developed an obsession with your disturbing thoughts, seek help from a mental health professional.
Understand the meaning of disturbing sexual thoughts. In most cases, disturbing thoughts about sex don’t mean anything at all. If the thoughts that you are having are repulsive to you or they involve violence or other illegal activities, then your mind might just be trying to understand those things. For example, someone might fantasize about raping someone who is unattainable to them. But in the process of thinking about raping someone, the person imagining the act would also imagine how the other person would be hurt by that act. Understanding the pain that the act should cause the person imagining the act to stop thinking about it.
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